While Ukrainian women are some of the most attractive in the world, due to the political history of the country and economic conditions, some are the most ruthless, conniving, and truly evil women you will ever have the unfortunate opportunity to meet in your life. I have dated one of these recently for about a month and here’s my report from in the trenches and why you should take my advice even when I don’t myself. How else would I get such great stories to share with you after all?
I met Elena, age 36, (so she claims) at the Couchsurfing foreigner meetup that happens weekly here in Kyiv, Ukraine. I was there to meet a new French guy and show him the place as well as introduce him to some of the expat community. We had a great time of course and it was made even better by the fact that while outside taking a break from the heat inside I had a girl approach me and introduce herself. When I asked her why she approached me she said she wanted to know why I was wearing a crown. Besides just being the King of Kyiv, the crown does tend to attract women as all women love shiny objects. We hit it off rather well, exchanged numbers, and agreed to get tea the next day as Elena did not typically drink alcohol.
We met up the next day and our tea date instead turned into a dinner date at my favorite Georgian restaurant. The date went extremely well and was a very good time. This is how it typically starts of course, they put their best face forward. We then had another date shortly thereafter where she came over and we watched a movie together. She made the first move and ended up sleeping over that night. We quickly fell into a routine of seeing each other almost every day until she started her new job. That’s when things started going downhill, fast.
In this time I learned a few things about Elena that were massive red flags and I would have advised anyone else to immediately run away from. First, she had two kids, but she wasn’t taking care of them, and had instead dumped them onto her parents. Second, she had an ex-husband who she was on bad terms with, however, the more she told me, the more I started to side with the guy from just her version of events. She described to me how she had been for years blocking the sale of his house as they had been married, and thus had gained half ownership over the property. I believe it was even his house from before they were married. He refused to sell the place or buy her out on principle, and she refused to sell the place or buy him out solely to screw him over. Sounds almost like typical western divorce really. She was also in constant contact with a lawyer regarding the issue, and some other issues which she never went into. The biggest red flag though was that she was 36, because while I am 34, because she is 36 it means she grew up through a time in Ukraine of extreme poverty. This has led to many people here developing a survival first, happiness later attitude. Women older than 25 here are often cold, manipulative, aggressive, and will flip on you for the smallest thing.
The first problem we had, that happens to every foreigner in Ukraine who dates a local woman, was a translation issue. I actually made a mistake and forgot an appointment that I had made regarding a language lesson with one of her co-workers. I was supposed to go swimming with Elena at 2pm, but she was handling the reservations and delayed it until 4pm, which also happened to be my language lesson appointment time for a zoom meeting. And frankly, I forgot, but had we not been swimming I would have seen the messages and been able to still make the appointment. This is where things went south. I messaged her co-worker to apologize for missing the meeting and mentioned I had been swimming with Elena, which is why I had not gotten back to her until an hour later. This was my mistake, as the two of them talked, and shortly after Elena was upset claiming I was trying to shift the blame for missing the meeting onto her. This was absolutely not my intent but given language translation issues this is what Elena concluded in her mind I had been trying to do.
As most guys know, once a woman thinks she is right, it’s almost impossible to change her mind. She’s also going to always hold over you anything she can and bring it up for the rest of your life. In both cases this is what Elena proceeded to do. I got to watch as she turned from a nice, caring, funny girl into a mega-cunt. This is when I saw another red flag, while trying to fix the situation she told me that words do not matter, only actions. I think she expected me to open my wallet and buy her gifts for the perceived slight. I drew a line in the sand here and once she said goodbye I also said goodbye. Our relationship ended over this simple language misunderstanding. It’s important to understand how quickly she flipped on me.
I gave her some time to calm down and then patched things up. She picked a Turkish restaurant to go to I had never been before. I ended up being triple charged, twice on my card which they pretended didn’t work, but went through just fine on my end and then eventually by cash. In hindsight it’s very possible she was responsible for and in on this small scam herself even though the bill was only $34, times three. Things went well enough for a little while, until they didn’t.
Here’s where the real drama starts. I was hanging out with my American friend who I had helped propose to his local girlfriend and discussing some business opportunities and generally hanging out when I got a text message from Elena. She was reminding me that her birthday was in a week and that she “expected gifts, roses, small bulbs only and cream or orange color, and an expensive dinner”. She then sent me two links to some specific jewelry that cost 15,000 uah in total, approximately $500. Add in the rare flowers and dinner and we’re looking at a $700 birthday, minimum. If that’s what she expected then, what next in less than a week on Valentine’s day…
I flat out told her no. I was absolutely disgusted by this behavior. $700 is more than the average monthly Ukrainian’s salary and gifts are gifts, not expectations. I have a strict no gift policy here in Ukraine personally and you should adopt this too. She would never have asked a local Ukrainian guy for such a thing, only me be because I am American. Again she went full ultra mega bitch by text messages, and then she started on her war path. She marked my messages as spam on Telegram to try to get my account restricted and then she went out of her way to try to start trying to causing drama for any of my contacts she had. If she tried anything else I don’t know because it didn’t work. Real pro-tip here guys, never let any girl you date here in Ukraine integrate herself with your social network. This is all too common where when you break up they will try to burn everything down. We broke up again.
This is where the real fun drama starts and I expected this to happen and she did not disappoint. One key point I need to explain first though, Elena is addicted to Tinder and treating men like shit by text. She also lied on Tinder listing her age as 31 and not 36. After catching her more than a few times on Tinder in bed or randomly she explained to me she just used it to mistreat men on the platform. Of course, I knew this was a half-truth, as I had seen her moving conversations off Tinder onto Telegram, so I knew she was probably cheating on me, or at least keeping her options open. She would send me screenshots daily of horrible messages she sent guys on Tinder and how they responded. It was pretty good trolling, but really showed who she was inside.
Like I said, I saw this coming. After 2 days silence she messaged me. It read like a planned script, and likely it was an idea given to her by one of her friends or she had done this before, possibly even planned this all along. Luckily, I already knew about this scam. First, she accused me of infecting her with an STD (I’m clean, I only pursue committed relationships and get tested between them, and never had one). She’s probably lying about this point, but if she’s not then it confirms that she was cheating on me. Next she threatened to go to the cops, and the embassy with reports against me. Another interesting point, her English became perfect instead of typical broken Slavic English, so she was clearly getting help from someone to construct these messages. Finally she demanded that I “silently pay her money or else she would go to the cops”. She even gave me a deadline a few days away. Yep, this is literally attempted blackmail, and of course I saved screenshots of the conversations which she deleted after. Considering I know I did nothing wrong and know about this scam already all I could bring myself to do was laugh my ass off and troll her back like she did to her Tinder guys. I didn’t engage her as she typed out her script to me. I just kept talking about pizza, how I wanted pizza, and did she want some pizza too? Then I sent her a picture of some pizza. Then I ordered a pizza to celebrate finding one of these scams in the wild. In America an evil woman like this could do real damage to a man with false allegations, so a huge thank you to Ukraine and it’s legal system for protecting men’s rights.
I spent some time thinking back on this nearly a month long relationship and I’ll never know for sure, but here’s what I have concluded. She approached me, so it’s possible I was a mark all along, as I represented a high value target she was able to invest some time in building up a relationship with. I actually have no way to know she really is 36 or what her birthday really is. She actively hid all her personal details, I don’t know her last name, where she lives, where she works, or any of her friends. She kept me completely isolated from her “other life”. She attempted to start drama over nothing and get me to make it up to her with “actions”, a soft ask for gifts. She then engaged in a lot of attempted emotional manipulation, got back together with me, and immediately stepped up her demands to $700+ of gifts. Had I given into that, in less than a week would have been round 2 of Valentine’s day. Then when none of that worked she resorted to threats and weakly attempted blackmail to extort cash out of me.
I saw all the red flags, and as I told my friends here about how my relationship was going they thought I was insane for dating her. Of course, everyone was right, even myself. Yet I still did it, because if I hadn’t done it I wouldn’t have such a great personal example to share with you about why you should absolutely never date women here over the age of 25. By then if they are single they are too damaged to form real long term emotional bonds with, and the odds of them having learned how to scam foreigners or resorted to other unethical things are too high. My total cost for this month worth of Elena entertainment was well under $100 and I hope my story helps you in the future avoid ending up in a situation like this.
Elena, if you’re reading this, I’ll buy you a pizza as a consolation prize for none of your scams working on me and even give you $50 if you’ll agree to come forward and do an interview.